- It is a movie.
- It made 12 million dollars in the US box office.
- It stars wrestling sensation (I guess) John Cena and was produced by the WWE.
- John Cena plays a cop -- you know, just a regular guy --who gets called in to help the FBI who is tracking down a man who can only be described as an amalgam of every bad guy in every movie ever made.
- The villain is really really smart. We know this because in the opening scene as the FBI is watching him, he walks past two strangers playing chess and quickly tells them what they're doing wrong. Only a really really smart person would be able to do that.
- The opening scene unfolds and the villain is about to get away when Cena foils his plan and kills the woman he loves (because as we all know, insane people can love too).
- A year later, Cena has been promoted to detective (along with his partner for some reason even though his partner did absolutely nothing to deserve it).
- Cena's girlfriend heads off to work and his cell phone rings. You guessed it! It's the villain! He starts out with some small talk and then reveals that he's out of prison and that they're going to play a game.
- Cena's house blows up and then he realizes that the villain has his girlfriend.
- And then Die Hard With a Vengeance begins. Just kidding. But not really. So the villain has Cena and his partner go to where the movie began and they see writing on a wall. Numbers. Cena takes a good minute to figure out that they're coordinates. His partner is baffled. "Where did you learn about that stuff?" (*that stuff = coordinates). Cena replies "Eighth grade Geography." The first real bit of dialogue in the entire movie.
- Then, all of a sudden, we learn that Cena has a brother who is a firefighter. And then a fire occurs and "round 3" begins in which Cena has to go into the fire and get out some safety deposit boxes.
- The FBI agents from the beginning show up to let the audience know that they're really bad guys.
- This was about 38 minutes into the movie and about the time that I stopped watching the movie and read a book.
- However, if anyone would like to know what happens in the following 9 rounds, please feel free to email me and I'll give you my best guess.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Things You Probably Didn't Know About: 12 Rounds
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6 comments:
You should also know "the villian" is played by Aidan Gillen, aka Tommy Carcetti on The Wire.
Yes. This is another shameless attempt to get everyone on the planet to watch The Wire.
I was going to mention that but I didn't want to give more credit to this movie than it deserves.
And anyone who hasn't seen The Wire is only hurting themselves.
I have no idea who John Cena is, but I kept picturing Jon Secada (c. 1992) as I read this.
This is so good. I mean, I would call this list "compelling reading." I think I am officially soliciting your best guess as to how the rest of it goes. So send, please.
Also, how do you stop watching movies? I guess I understand at home but less so if rented and not at all if in the theater. BUT -- In the past two months I have stopped watching two movies on Sundance or IFC. So I guess I am losing the patience I once had. Maybe I will list-describe them for you.
Well, you know how you got 3 movies from netflix and kept them for a year without watching them? I watch them no matter what and send them back. So, often times that means only watching 30 minutes or so.
Best guess to ending? His partner dies and while trying to save his girl, the FBI gets in his way and he eventually unravels a conspiracy between the feds and the villain and at the very end, he meets up with the villain (bloodied and bruised and probably in a warehouse or something) and saves his girlfriend at the last second while the villain plummets to his death.
some day we'll look back on this and test it out.
good point re:netflix
off topic: I am watching Mother on HBO. They are parking at the grocery store.
"You're going around again. This is like a ride at Disney Land."
"You didn't have to grab the wheel."
"I had to do something. Someone had to stop us from going around again."
And now they are shopping. MMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm NuTaste.
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