Things You Probably Didn't Know About: The Office

• B.J. Novak (Ryan Howard) graduated from Harvard with a degree in English and Spanish Literature. He went to high school with...
• John Krasinski who graduated from Brown as a playwright with honors. He wrote and directed his first feature film coming out later this year called "Brief Interviews with Hideous Men".
• Mindy Kaling (Kelly Kapoor) is also a co-writer of the show and wrote the play "Matt and Ben" for broadway. She played Ben.
• Creed Bratton was a member of the 60's band, The Grassroots. Since leaving the band he has released 3 solo albums, the latest of which is called "Creed Bratton".
• Jenna Fischer (Pam Beesley) wrote and directed a movie called "LoliLove" with her (now ex) husband. She is also one of the hottest women on the face of the earth (along with Tina Fey).
• Paul Lieberstein (Toby) is also a co-writer but probably got the job because the he is the brother-in-law of creator, Greg Daniels. He is also the brother-in-law of Angela. Haven't figured that one out yet.
  

ACL 2009 Line-up!

* Pearl Jam
* Dave Matthews Band
* Beastie Boys
* Kings of Leon
* Ben Harper and Relentless7
* Thievery Corporation
* John Legend
* The Dead Weather
* The Levon Helm Band
* Ghostland Observatory
* Sonic Youth
* Mos Def
* Toadies
* Flogging Molly
* The B-52s
* Lily Allen
* Citizen Cope
* Arctic Monkeys
* The Decemberists
* Coheed and Cambria
* Andrew Bird
* Girl Talk
* STS9 (Sound Tribe Sector 9)
* Phoenix
* Bassnectar
* Bon Iver
* !!!
* Avett Brothers
* The Airborne Toxic Event
* Medeski, Martin & Wood
* Clutch
* Michael Franti & Spearhead
* Grizzly Bear
* Heartless Bastards
* Passion Pit
* White Lies
* Dan Auerbach
* The Walkmen
* The Scabs
* Reckless Kelly
* DeVotchka
* Blitzen Trapper
* The Virgins
* Here We Go Magic
* Eek-A-Mouse
* K'Naan
* Asleep at the Wheel
* Dr. Dog
* The Raveonettes
* The Knux
* Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears
* State Radio
* Los Amigos Invisibles
* The Felice Brothers
* Federico Aubele
* Raul Malo
* Daniel Johnston
* Poi Dog Pondering
* Brett Dennen
* Rodriguez
* Henry Butler
* Preservation Hall
* Sam Roberts Band
* The Greencards
* Sara Watkins
* Walter "Wolfman" Washington
* David Garza
* John Vanderslice
* Zac Brown Band
* Todd Snider
* School of Seven Bells
* The Dodos
* Robyn Hitchcock and the Venus 3
* Alberta Cross
* Deer Tick
* Bell X1
* Alela Diane
* The Wood Brothers
* The Parlor Mob
* Rebirth Brass Band
* Marva Wright
* Terri Hendrix
* L.A.X.
* Lisa Hannigan
* The Low Anthem
* Sons of Bill
* Suckers
* Sarah Jaffe
* Cotton Jones
* The Henry Clay People
* Papa Mali
* Jypsi
* Vince Mira
* Jonathan Tyler & The Northern Lights
* Mimicking Birds
* Jeffrey Steele
* Jonell Mosser
* Leatherbag
* Keith Gattis
* Damien Horne
* Sarah Siskind
* The Dexateens
* Nelo
* Danny Brooks
* Reverend Peyton's Big Damn Band
* The Soul Stirrers
* The Durdens
* Palm School Elementary
* The Gospel Silvertones
* Diaconos
* Quinn Sullivan
* Ralph's World
* Q Brothers
* Milkshake
* Telephone Company
* Loose Cannons
* Lunch Money

Information I have collected about the Swine Flu from conversations with others

+ Do not get on an airplane
+ Do not let ANYONE touch my child
+ Do not go to Fiesta across the street from my house, go to river oaks instead for my groceries
+ Do not talk/ touch any Mexicans
+ Do not worry about it at all, it is just a scare tactic by the media

Things That Make My Step-Dad Who He Is

1) Ziggy coffee mug that is at least 10 years old
2) Ham Radio
3) 2 Tractors for mowing one yard
4) A new truck that can never be driven, touched, or looked at
5) Bathrobe which can only be worn OVER a full outfit *sometimes accompanied by winter hat
6) Rye bread. Yuck.
7) A microwave in which he can reheat his ONE cup of coffee throughout the entire day. Double yuck.
8) Our 2 cats. He loves them more than his family. * sidenote, he gave one of them "cat CPR" when my fat nephew sat on him and almost killed him.
9) Stamps with which to MAIL in his tax return. Seriously, who does that anymore?
10) The blue lazy boy chair in which he falls asleep within 2 seconds upon sitting.

Original Drinks for Somers, Connecticut (Summer)

Lakewater - Hot water with lemon juice.
Pukebroth - Every vegetable known to man, bathed in water for several hours
Nontastie - Strawberries, blueberries, raspberries with rice protein and soy milk (no flavor)
Antistarbuck - Organic, decaf coffee with soy milk
Thenewalcohol - Water

Original Drinks for Lakehouse/Bayhouse Weekends

• Lakewater - vodka & lime-flavored LaCroix with twist of lime
  
• Vodkaccino - vodka & Starbucks bottled Frappuccino
  
• Humble Wildcat - vodka & Purplesaurus Rex Koolaid garnished with cherry
  
• POCktail - vodka & Cherry LimeAid, a splash of Sprite with lime wedge
  
• Grimm Raider - vodka & Gatorade (blue)

Movie (posters) I am excited to see....

In case you did not know me in my collegiate-credit-card-debt-building days, I am kind of obsessed with movie posters (also album art -- I blame Sonny Malone).

Here are some posters that get me all giddy about upcoming movies I know little-to-nothing about:





In the documentary category:



Then there are the pics where the poster doesn't matter, but it sure is nice when they look like this:




^^^Meet the movie made just for me.

this post inspired by Jon's comment regarding Up:

beautiful

Happy Belated Birthday, Julie & Alana

I will post the list of the movies in the comments (it's long!).

I have no idea why this guy picked this song, but it's nice work anyhow.

Cannes Line-Up!

• Pedro Almodovar - Broken Embraces
  
• Andrea Arnold - Fish Tank
• Jacques Audiard - Un Prophete
• Marco Bellocchio – Vincere
• Jane Campion - Bright Star
• Xavier Giannoli – A L’Origine
• Isabel Coixet – Map of the Sounds of Tokyo
• Michael Haneke - The White Ribbon
• Ang Lee – Taking Woodstock
• Ken Loach – Looking for Eric
• Lou Ye - Spring Fever
• Brillante Mendoza – Kinatay
• Gaspar Noe – Enter The Void
• Park Chan-Wook – Thirst
• Alain Resnais – Les Herbes Folles
• Elia Suleiman – The Time That Remains
• Quentin Tarantino - Inglourious Basterds
• Johnnie To – Vengeance
• Tsai Ming-liang – Face
• Lars Von Trier – Antichrist

Things at the NOLA Airport

I am currently sitting at a table across from four plastic dispensers. They are labeled as follows:

• napkins
• knives
• multi-purpose spoons
• forks

I am so intrigued by the multi-purposes of the spoons and why they are so superior to the other utensils that I can not concentrate on work. (The bold font is as it appears on the dispenser.)

I am currently sitting next to a youngish (and skinny) lady who just ordered a plate of food. She ordered the following:

• Fried catfish
• Fried shrimp
• French fries
• Hush puppies

It smells like a chicken-selling convenience store and is making me so sick at my stomach I can not on concentrate on work.

People at the NOLA airport I want to punch:

• Old man sipping coke out of a styrofoam cup and standing in front of the otherwise empty check-in kiosk for over 15 minutes.
• The little-orphan-Annie look-a-like with giant cardboard tube trying to get in front of me in line to stand with her "friends" who clearly hated her and left her on purpose because she yells things like "Hey, I found my intinerary" which was crumpled up in a ball at the bottom of her annoying backpack.
• The person who priced 10-oz. plastic cups of Miller lite at $7.89.
• The youngish (and skinny) lady who just ordered the incredibly smelly (and might I add, loud -- the grease is audible as it slips through her fingers, no joke) plate of fried food.

Given The Opportunity, Would You Sleep With Kirsten Dunst? (AKA, how I spent Saturday night arguing with a drunk gal in San Francisco)

Seriously, would YOU sleep with Kirsten Dunst if you had the chance? The cons of the situation are evident — by Hollywood standards, she ain’t exactly gonna crack the E! list of the 100 Hottest Celebrity Asses And V*ginas anytime soon, nor is she in line for any Acting Oscars / Primetime Emmys / Participation Trophies From Tooth-Related Competitions. She’s also been associated with Justin Long, who’s like 1% above just, like, a dude.

ON THE PLUS SIDE, though, she was in Eternal Sunshine, and Spider-Man 2 had its moments (not of her hotness, but moments), and I’ve never slept with anyone in the actual realm of celebrity (I don’t count Kathy Najimy, as it was years after Hocus Pocus), plus it would make for one hell of a blog post, possibly even better than those liveblogs every time I have sex now.

THE VERDICT: Definitely YES. Would I lose a little dignity and snark cred in exchange for the ability to watch Spider-Man with my grandkids and brag that I banged Mary Jane, and having my three-year-old granddaughter turn to me and say “I don’t even know what ‘banged’ means and that’s still f*cking disgusting”? Yes. Yes I would.

I'm sorry Julie, Karen and everyone else....

But here are my top 5 moments of Lost/ top 5 biggest disappointments with Lost...
* This is more for Blaine, QT, and my long lost friend, D.J.

Top 5 Moments

5) When Sayid shoots a young Ben in season 5. Wow.
4) When Hurley discovers that his winning lottery numbers are not only the exact code for the hatch, but also the reason they crashed!
3) End of season 4 when Ben moves the island and a boat discovers the survivors (and it turns out to be Penny). Ooooooh, I get chills just thinking about it.
2) End of season 3. They made television history by showing us that everything we've been seeing is actually a flashback of 3 years earlier. While this was television history in the making, it would have made #1 if it wasn't for...
1) First episode of season 3. This is when the writers CLEARLY decided how to finish the series. We get to see the "others" going about their daily business and get to see the plane crash and how Ben handles the situation. While maybe this wasn't groundbreaking for television, for LOST, it was the most pivotal moment in the show.


Top 5 problems...
5) When the "Oceanic 6" have Penny drop them off at a nearby island so they can convince the world that everyone else is dead, why did Aaron have to go with them? It seems rather dangerous to bring a baby that doesn't belong to anyone and would be much better off in the safe confines of a large boat (especially with Desmond and Kate).
4) Kate and Sawyer having sex. Just gross. Can you imagine how bad you would smell and taste? Yuck.
3) Mr. Eko. He was by far the most interesting part of season 2 and yet we all know that story is dead because they have bigger fish to fry. Of course, I could be wrong. I mean, it's not over yet.
2) Season 5 when Faraday talks to Desmond (of the past) and tells him to find his mom. If this happened in the past, why wouldn't Desmond recognize Faraday when he sees him in the present? MORE IMPORTANTLY, if Desmond was only able to remember this happening AS IT HAPPENED, how come Charlotte could remember Daniel telling her to leave the island as a little girl. Ugh time travel!!!!
1) The smoke monster. You and I both know they thought this was the coolest f'in thing for the first season and then realized "oh shit, we're going to have to explain this!" and have YET to come up with anything. How about a military test? something! anything!

Recent (or upcoming) Movies that Jon and I Could Have Written

• The Soloist

I doubt we would have come up with Robert Downey, Jr. ,but Jamie Foxx is a shoo-in. I think we probably would have used Adrien Brody, just for Katie. Or maybe Jim Carrey. Still, the plot is a no-brainer (ok, ok, it's based on a true story but still..).

• State of Play

Everything is right about this movie. The cast reads like a dream line up from a movies-for-sale pitch or, even the old days of Oscar forums (updated for current stars)...Russell Crowe, Ben Affleck, Rachel McAdams, Jeff Daniels, Jason Bateman, Robin Wright Penn, Viola Davis, and for the prestige factor -- Helen Mirren. Absolutely brilliant. And based on British TV.

• And finally - Just announced, Somewhere -- The movie Jon already wrote!!! This is fucking great. (Mia already made a poster for it too.)
  

I will let Ryan Adams from Awards Daily do the talking....

"Thanks to richard crawford for the wake up call about Sofia Coppola’s next project, announced last night in Variety. Set in the famed celebrity hangout, the Chateau Marmont on Sunset Blvd, the script Coppola’s written centers on a self-involved actor in rascally pursuit of hedonistic pleasures who gets a wake up call of his own when his 11-year-old daughter shows up to help realign his priorities.

If you’re thinking Adrian Brody and Abigail Breslin you’re not thinking hip enough. Colin Farrell and Saoirse Ronan? Too hip. Try Stephen Dorff and Elle Fanning. ahh… just right. Another perfect fit is Sophia Coppola and Focus Features, the winning combination behind the hipness of Lost in Translation."

Elle Fanning!!!

The Most Important Thing I Learned While Taking Online Defensive Driving

This was actually on the second to last section of my defensive driving. I WISH I was making this up...

Share Yourself
In years to come, the children may not remember which museums or sights they saw, but they will remember having your loving and undivided attention.
Along the journey, share memories, stories and songs
Take a lot of photos

Traveling with children is a wonderful opportunity to create memories that will last a lifetime.

Surprisingly, NONE of this information was on the quiz. I will never go 50 in a 40 in Frisco, Tx again.

Reasons I Hate American Idol

1) My mom won't shut up about how Adam Lambert is going to be bigger than Elvis. Seriously, she has said this more than 5 times now. Bigger than Elvis.
2) My step dad tries to vote (by calling in) every night but has trouble getting through. I get to hear about it the next day. When I ask him why he doesn't just text he says because it costs money. So, after doing some math in my head I came up with the following equation. 2 hours of my step dad's time < $.50. Interesting.
3) My step dad stayed up watching it last night instead of working on his taxes so he spent all day today (April 15th) working on his taxes and at 4:00 pm asked me to go the post office and spend 40 minutes in line to get them mailed. Found out afterwards that they were just extensions. Apparently he's way too busy watching American Idol to work on the actual tax part.
4) I don't like Danny's glasses.

*** I haven't seen a single episode this season:(

Number of Pirates Killed By Each President

Just for comparison's sake. It feels a little wrong to file this under “badass,” and yet I'm still not to a point where I can take this pirate thing seriously.

(via Buzzfeed)

If I had a job, people I would work for and be happy...

1) Roger Sterling/ Don Draper - I couldn't decide which one I would want to work for MORE so I put them both at #1. I could be a full-fledged alcoholic, have sex with lots of hot secretaries, and still manage to keep a family at bay. Oh, and come up with ads? Where do I sign?

2) John Locke - The man knows what he wants. I would imagine that every day he would tell me some INSANE thing to do for him and I would want to question it, but every day I would realize that he knew what he was doing and the insane thing I did had a purpose. What a cool job.

3) Charlie Crews - For those of you who don't know, there is a show called "Life". And it is mediocre but addicting. The main character, however, is AWESOME. He also knows how to kill people with one punch. I would be okay working for someone like that. Oh, and solving crimes? Yes. And he would make me eat a lot more fruit.

4) Tess McGill - Sassy, sexy and a woman? Yes, one of the few women I would work for (not counting Ripley, but somehow I don't see her as a "businesswoman".) I think I would go far with Miss McGill. Yes, very far indeed. And now that I think about it, I would work for pretty much any woman because they are better than men.

5) Franklin M. Hart, Jr - It would be nice not to have to be so friggin' p.c.

reasons why i finally believe the economy is that bad

i have been in denial and living in a nice houston bubble for the past 6 mos...but reality hit me today....this is very very bad and here is why

1. my property tax appraisal for 2009 is lower than 2008
2. cost cutting at work - for EVERYTHING - including things fundamental to our jobs and things partners like to do like training and conferences
3. stories of people being called into conference rooms and fired on the spot - like 40 at a time
4. my biggest client who is a huge oil company has a loss
5. i am not getting a raise or a bonus this year ( i have known this for about 3 months but it seems more real now that it is about to happen)

Reasons why I hated *LOST* last night

1. "No Jack!"
I've never really understood the Jack hate...but then again, I've never really appreciated John Locke's utter existence...soooooo, cosmically, I think that's about right.

2. Smokey Letdown
Seriously...WTF...the most important piece of the Lost mythos and the best Messrs Lindelof and Cuse can come up with is a deleted scene from Backdraft? Not to mention the big reveal that a porta john/bat phone can - sometimes - be used to summon the beast...Damn...I wish I could quit you Lost!!!

3. “If everything you’ve done was in the best interest of the island, the monster should understand.”
Ugggghhhhhhhhh...

Fun with the News

Here is a list of bad jokes using headlines from today.

• "Pakistan has created a Frankenstein of its own." I hope they name it Frakistan.

thank you, thank you

• "US crew attack on pirates called brave, foolhardy" More like, foolhar-har-hardy.

thank you, thank you

• Well, I was going to take a Scott Macintyre headline and make a joke out of it, but it seems the news agencies are on top of the bad wordplay game. Witness:

'American Idol' Recap: Scott MacIntyre's 'Search' Is Over
'American Idol' recap: Getting off Scott-free
Piano Unmanned: Did Mixed Signals Seal Scott's Fate?
Scott Not an American Idol Elimination Survivor

These people are nicer than I was going to be.

Reasons why I loved *LOST* last night

**SPOILER ALERT**

1. Desmond!!! (there are not enough exclamation points in the world)
2. No Jack!
3. "He told me to wait for John Locke." (squeee!)
4. Smokey Smackdown
5. The Acting!
6. Adios, Caesar. Who the fuck do you think you are? (this is perhaps my favorite moment of the entire series)
   

Honorable Mention: Hairpieces.

*****************************

Also of note on TV last night:

1. Bye bye, birdsnest!
2. Whew, Kris! You almost blew it.
   
3. Fuck off, Gokey.
4. Better off Ted is stoops.
   

Best Things I Did Last Week

5. Political fundraiser (vote Brewster! vote Sheryl! vote Chris Riley!)
4. Attended the Young Men's Business League Spring Fling (feel free to laugh)
3. Had a wait...i-know-you conversation like this. "Hey. Oh yeah...We've met before. I'm Julie." - "I know. I'm Stix!?!?!?" (all punctuation should be pictured on Styx's face (I don't know how to spell it)).
2. Chit-chatted with Blaine, Karen, Austen, Ragan, and Kim.
1. Renegade Karaoke

Things Found In My Backseat After dlm and Candice Came Along for a Ride

1. The top to a Drumstick wrapper
2. An empty packet of Pop Rocks
3. A frito chip with some chili remnants on it
4. A stick of Burts Bee's Wax
5. Kite assembly instructions (also with chili remnants on it)

things i learned about will last night

1. if he were a model he would be a jacket model
2. if everything in life were an Olympic sport he would win a gold medal in long distance walking - mainly because he walks at least 2 miles at work every day
3. he thinks Blaine is addicted to whoopie goldberg
4. he is afraid of heights
5. despite his fear of heights he thinks he could also compete in Olympic trampoline - "because you don't have to jump that high"
6. XXX is the worst movie he has ever seen

Missed Connections

Here are four *missed connection* ads from Craigslist. I am pretty sure they were all written by the same person, but still....

You look great in hats - 35 (The Gap- Rice Village)

You're blond with blue eyes and you were trying on hats today. I really wanted to tell you that you have the most amazingly shaped head, unfortunately, the smell in that place was really getting to me and my eyes started watering. I ran outside for air and then you were gone. Please, please, please reply. You've restored my interest in haberdashery again. Also, when you reply, tell me what that smell was so I'll know it's you.

Brunch at Farrago - 30 (Midtown)

You were with two hot guys having brunch at Farrago today. You looked oh-so-handsome and masculine, despite the fact you were drinking a pink bellini through a tiny black straw. And when you put that cherry to your lips and licked it, I nearly creamed my pants. I wanted to talk to you, but someone left my cake out in the rain, and...I'll never have that recipe again. Tell me what the special was at Farrago today, and let's find out what else you can do with your tongue.

We coulda done more in fitting room - 28 (Banana Republic-Rice Village)

You have dark hair and dark eyes and a boyish charm. You were trying on a garishly colored sweater vest. I was blinded by the color and your shockingly good looks. By the time my vision returned to normal, you were gone. I hope you were real and not just a vision. I know that place is very over-priced, but I'm going to shop there non-stop until I see you again. If you contact me, tell me what the color the sweater was so I'll know it's you and so I'll know what to call it in my complaint letter to Banana Republic.

Hot Guy at Urban Outfitters - 30 (Rice Village)

You were trying on glasses that reminded me of my granny. You kind of look like the guy who stuck his finger in my butt at the Ripcord a few weeks ago, but I can't be sure. Tell me what I was wearing and let's go for the other four.

The Spider Man Three

(the spi·der man three)
n.

1. Highly anticipated major movie release that you plan on seeing but all of your friends somehow saw the day it came out, so you never end up having anyone to go with and thus never see it in theaters.

2. Movie you finally end up watching a year after it came out and inevitably find it not as good/bad as your friends were raving/complaining.

Example Sentence:
I finally watched Spider-Man 3 on tv last night after somehow missing it in theaters, and I’m not sure why all my friends sh*t all over it so much, it really wasn’t any worse or more ridiculous than the first two. I know they’re summer blockbusters, so they’re just supposed to be fun, goofy popcorn flicks, but was Peter Parker’s retarded Buddy-Love-if-he-looked-like-Pete-Wentz hedonistic turn any more ridiculous than Dr. Octopus magically turning evil because his arms take control of him and his arms are total d*cks for some reason then he gets into a fight with Spider-Man on the huge above-ground train that runs through the middle of Manhattan and makes a deal with Harry Osborne to get more of his rare science material instead of just forcing him to do it then re-attempts to create the sun and it ends up killing him?

Spider-Man 3 was a total Spider-Man 3!

(You’re welcome, people. Use and enjoy.)

RE: "EW greatest villains? Puh-lease" / "my favorite movie villains"

If I made a list (novel idea indeed!) I'd throw a few bones to the following vile humans of recent memory:

Frank Lucas, American Gangster

Wearing the title of “American Gangster,” Mr. Washington had some big shoes to fill, but after slapping on his period-piece-ass hairstyle and scrawling “I will not just reprise my role in ‘Training Day’” onto a blackboard a thousand times, Denzel turned Frank Lucas into one of the most sympathetic big-house-buying heroin kingpins this side of 80’s Mötley Crüe. He doesn’t kill many innocent people, and he never shivs his grandmother with one of his heroin needles, but for a former Sexiest Man Alive, Washington makes a pretty damn good villain. Almost as good as Harry Hamlin, even.

Billy Mitchell, The King of Kong

Has there ever been a more intense scene in a documentary than when Hotsauce McMullet strolled into the Funspot Arcade and refused to make eye contact with Steve Weibe? Before you name a bunch of documentary scenes that definitely were, I’ll answer for you: NO. Whenever I watch documentaries, I’m always intentionally cognizant of the filmmaker’s bias (they totally made those Enron guys look like criminals!) but there was simply no way anyone could come out of this movie and say anything other than the literal sentence, “Man, Billy Mitchell really seems like a douche.”

Ben Linus, Lost

If Michael Emerson offered me a glass of water, I’m pretty sure I’d psychologically tear myself to pieces wondering whether or not to accept it. Still, just when I was beginning to believe that Ben’s cryptic, bug-eyed advice might have been for a greater good, I was treated with a flashback of Ben murdering his father with poison gas because he just daggum couldn’t remember Lil’ Benny’s birthday. Jack’s cathartic pummeling of Ben in the Season 3 finale reminded me of Sam finally beating the crap out of Gollum in the third “Lord of the Rings” movie. But with a goofier looking bad guy, of course.

Anton Chigurh, No Country For Old Men

Ok, so I've never been considered original (sorry Blaine...)

Remorseless, unstoppable, and damn near magical, Javier Bardem’s ghostlike hitman was so damn convincing, I sat in the theater assuring myself that the golden ticket from “Last Action Hero” was real and that Chigurh was definitely going to step out of the screen and murder me. I came away from this film vowing to never pick up a sack of money, use a take-a-penny at a convenience store, accept a Christmas gift, read a magazine at a doctor’s office, or enjoy a sunset, fully convinced that any such actions would result in my being imminently brained by a wacky, air-powered Super Soaker. Maybe George Wendt could protect me?

Kathryn Merteuil, Cruel Intentions

Ok...I now this is a pretty pathetic offering to end with, but what's better than an evil, bored, stuck up bitch who likes to ruin people's lives for fun and deflower virgins for sport? Survey says: Nothing. She is the ultimate bitch. Extra Credit for line delivery: "I wanna f*ck!"

FYI...this flick was released in 1999 and I still have a boner.

Honorable Mention
HAL 9000 - (bested me again Mr. Morris...)
Amon Goeth - Schindler's List
Eve Harrington - All About Eve
Tony Perkis - Heavy Weights

Mini-List #2 - The Judds' Girls Night Out Covers

Because I am incapable of making an actual list, I have invented the mini-list: lists with three items or less. CLEVER HUH??
On to the list.

My favorite covers of The Judds' Girls Night Out on YouTube:

#1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quiQDl0NldM


#2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrCNfPDs_0M


#3 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7URlJueY_vY

my favorite movie villains

• Jamie Lee Curtis in *Mother's Boys*
• Macauley Culkin in *The Good Son*
• The shark in *Deep Blue Sea*
  
• Timothy Olyphant in *Die Hard 4*
• Rebecca Demornay in *The Hand that Rocks the Cradle*

Honorable Mention - John Travolta in whatever

there are more -- who are they?

RE: "EW greatest villains? Puh-lease"

I was going to add a comment to Jon's post, but I think there is a word limit on comments, and I am going to say too much. I lose editing abilities at 3am. First of all, Jon, you are correct it is busy times at the P-dub. I am not sure where QT is, but I think he has a meeting tomorrow that I was supposed to help with and totally neglected. Sorry about that, QT.

So here are some thoughts I have on the villains.

In the magazine, Stephen King gives his take (http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20268412,00.html). Jon, you'll like that Dracula is Stephen King's number one. I would steal some characters from his list -- namely...

• Anton Chigurh, NCFOM -- He's got to be near the top because 1) he basically represents evil, so he's all-encompassing (2) he is unaffected by emotion (your problem with Darth Vader) and is driven by his own cold logic (3) he has catchphrases and a signature look (!) and (4) SPOILER ALERT he stays both evil and alive.

• Sauron, LOTR -- Just fuckin scary.

• Harry Powell, NOTH -- This guy, like Chigurh, has no emotion. Plus he's dressed like a Reverend, he's hot, he whistles, he rides his horse against that ominous horizon, and he is after an old lady and some kids. Hard to top that.

Other villains not mentioned in the magazine that I think are worth considering:

Human:

• Uncle Charlie in *Shadow of a Doubt* - People borrow the phrase the "banality of evil" to talk about one of Hitchcock's big themes. Uncle Charlie nails it.
• Mrs. Iselin *The Manchurian Candidate* - The Cold War's Lady Macbeth. Bonus points for manipulation -- she never does the dirty work. (For what it's worth, I really think Angela Lansbury's performance is one of the top five best ever).
• Noah Cross *Chinatown* - Mrs. Iselin's perfect match. XOX
  

Mechanical:

• Christine -- I feel like you've got to have a Stephen King character, and while I'm torn between Annie Wilkes, that It clown, and Cujo, I pick Christine because (1) I am afraid of crazy bitches with whom you can not reason and (2) because she is the heaviest.
• HAL 9000 in *2001* - Christine + Anton Chigurh = HAL

Alien:

• General Zod -- Way less funny than Lex Luthor. Bonus points for his buddies.
  
• Ming the Merciless -- Thinks Earth is a toy, sends his own daugther to the boreworms for (understandably) being horny for Flash Gordon, brainwashes a doctor, almost? rapes a journalist, and (obviously) shows no mercy. Does it all to theme music by Queen.

Other:

• Bureaucracy - *Brazil* - Probably the scariest of them all.
  

And my personal #1 --

• Mr. Dark, the leader of the carnival in *Something Wicked This Way Comes* -- He's the complete package for me. Pure evil -- and talk about banal -a carnival in the Midwest for crying out loud. Goes after kids. No mercy. Ruins you afterlife, too. No one will ever haunt (or inspire) nightmares for me like that guy did. It's not possible.

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EW greatest villains? Puh-lease

1) Wicked witch of the west. Really? I haven't seen the movie in many many years but doesn't she get bested by a teenage girl?
2) Darth Vader. WRONG. A true villain doesn't change his evil ways at the last minute to repent for all of his wrong deeds. If they had said The Emperor, maybe.
3) Hannibal Lecter. FINALLY a good one. I would even go so far as to move Mr. Lecter up to the number 2 spot.
4) The Joker. They didn't specify but one can only assume they meant Heath Ledger's Joker. And if so, bravo. If not, lame.
5) Alex DeLarge. WRONG. He was just a mixed up kid.
6) Montgomery Burns. Yes yes and yes. I like him at number 6 too.
7) Catherine Tramell. Ugh, I guess they needed more women so they put her on here. And also I guess they never saw Romeo is Bleeding.
8) Voldemort. WHAT? Again, haven't read the book in ages but doesn't he almost get killed by a BABY???? No. That is not true evil.
9)Dracula. This should be in the top 3 easily. Maybe even number 1. I mean, Dracula really doesn't have any feelings and drinks people's blood and has orgies with beautiful women all the time and...doesn't he?
10) Nurse Ratched. LAME. Again, I know they're trying to name people that mainstream america might recognize but how about Mrs. Voorhees or better yet, that chick from The Frighteners.

**** Benjamin Linus should be in the top 3 as well. Any other contenders for top 10?