rambling about Avatar

WARNING: POTENTIAL SPOILERS (but who cares)
This will be quick and dirty. I don't have the energy to be intelligent.

Things I loved about Avatar

• *visually stunning*
• I loved Dances with Wolves when it came out in 1990, when I was 18, so obviously some part of me must like something about this
  

Things I liked about Avatar

• Sam Worthington (this is probably superficial)
• Sigourney Weaver (this is reverential)
  
• when everyone looked like they were in a roller disco in 1984 (blacklight!)
• the first well-placed arrow near the end
• those tree seeds. pretty.
• It made me want to watch Flash Gordon.
  

Things I did not like about Avatar

• I thought The Last Samurai was derivative of Dances with Wolves when it came out in 2003.
• Giovanni Ribisi's next-t0-most ridiculous performance (The Other Sister)
• tentacle sex with everything
• frisbee lizards
• blue aliens playing basketball in gym clothes
• all animals look like gross versions of Earth animals
• Sigourney Weaver's speeches
• the nerd
• Michelle Rodriguez
  

Things I hated about Avatar

• the overbearing and inconsistent score
• Queen did not do the soundtrack
  
• the Colonel (as an aside - he's in the closet, I guarantee you)
  
• the Colonel's coffee cup
• the actor that played the Colonel
  
• the lack of character development (I am being generous by imagining the Colonel is in the closet)
  
• Sigourney Weaver's avatar outfit, hair, and walk
• the yoga scenes
• the rally-the-tribes montage
• Sam Worthington trashtalking to giant hammerheaded elephorhinoceri
• the fact that there was a nerd, a colonel and Michelle Rodriguez --- a 6th grader in a creative writing class could have conceived of these characters
• the forced shot of the golf ball
• all the other forced shots
• the terrible song that sounds unbelievably similar to *My Heart Will Go On*
• all the hissing. what are these people, Thundercats? oh wait. Yes.