Today's Most Popular Facebook Status Update Topics

OR: What is wrong with these people? (with commentary)

1. "My Baby's First Day of School!" (Usually accompanied by banal observations of tears and wardrobe.)
2. "My health update" (Gross.)
   
3. "Boo, it's Monday" (aka: I am as funny as a 1985 Garfield comic.)
4. Song lyric excerpt (Please stop.)
5. Something I own is broken and I am having it fixed today and I would like to complain about customer service. (Fill out a comment card. I don't give a shit.)

A Few Early Oscar Thoughts...

- Even with the expanded set, Shutter Island fails to receive a Best Picture/Best Actor/ or Best Director nod*
- Not so sure about Bright Star and Abbie Cornish's chances either...the buzz is deafening, but I'm bored.
- The Best Actress race is over: Carey Mulligan (An Education)
- I'd like to say the same holds true for Morgan Freeman (Invictus), but I'm wondering what those nasty rumors will do for his campaign?
- Christoph Waltz (Inglourious Basterds) seems like a no-brainer for the Supporting Actor short list
-No go for Michelle Pfeiffer (Cheri). At the risk of upsetting the List Anything Gods, I ask: when did the mere announcement of a Pfeiffer choice equate to immediate Oscar Speculation?
- As expected, Johnny Depp (Public Enemies) sneaks into the Best Actor list...with little, to no fanfare.
- (500) Days of Summer gets some Original Screenplay kudos
- A heated sci-fi, District 9 vs. Avatar debate resonates, with the former pushing for a Best Picture spot

* So, in a stunning development, I just read the film is getting pushed to 2010. I'll boldly predict (based on the gloriously underwhelming trailer) that it gets shut out then too.

Things I've Given Up On This Week

1. Running
2. Big Brother
3. The hope of winning bar trivia
4. CNN
5. My "don't add people, let them add you" Facebook policy
   

10 Actors I'm Surprised to Learn That I Love

10. William Hurt
Ok, not so much that I love him...but HOW much I love him. Lately he's done soooo much with so little (A History of Violence, Mr. Brooks, The Good Shepherd).

9. Columbus Short
Who?!? Kid's got charisma (read: Will Smith). Ya...weird to have an Oscar winner followed by the lead in Stomp the Yard, but what the hell...it's my list.

8. Josh Hartnett
Seemed to have found a nice balance 8 years ago (O, Pearl Harbor, Black Hawk Down, 40 Days & 40 Nights). Wish he'd hit a groove again...but alas, I can't hate the guy.

7. Michael Sheen
6. Danny Huston
5. Jamie Foxx

4. Hayden Christensen
It always feels like he's sleepwalking through scenes and when he throws down some pathos it feels like a strain. So suffice it to say, I don't really have an excuse for this one. I like the guy, even if he sucks.

3. Leonardo DiCaprio
As a member of my high school newspaper I wrote a column denouncing all that was "Never Let Go" Leo. Dam fine actor, but still an insufferable public persona.

2. Alec Baldwin

1. Dane Cook
All. Credibility. Lost.

Actors Who Will NEVER Turn Me:
Clint Eastwood
Tim Robbins
Kevin Spacey
John Travolta (minus the dick Travolta, e.g., Face/Off, Broken Arrow)
Kevin Spacey (yes, hate him that much)
Tim Roth (I really f*cking hate this dude)

Items received in the mail today at work sent by my mother

• Ground Beef Cookbook - Containing over 500 ground beef recipes
  
  
• The Chicken Cookbook - 39th National Chicken Cooking Contest Recipes
  
  
• Taste of Home Ground Beef Recipe Collection - Dozens of main dishes...plus appetizers, soups, sandwiches and lots more family-pleasing fare! 262 Recipes! MEAT LOAVES, MEAT PIES, SKILLETS AND MORE! [Vol. 3, 1999 (Display until August 10)]
  
  
• Wok cooking for beginners - By China Connection

A couple of things to note:
-I do not own a wok
-I will never make the mistake of asking my mother to email me a chicken spaghetti recipe again
-If anyone would like any recipes, please let me know

(the other) QT's 20 Favorite Movies Since 1992

1992 = Reservoir Dogs

Battle Royale
Anything Else
Audition
Blade
Boogie Nights
Dazed & Confused
Dogville
Fight Club
Fridays
The Host
The Insider
Joint Security Area
Lost In Translation
The Matrix
Memories of Murder
Police Story 3
Shaun of the Dead
Speed
Team America
Unbreakable

the video

REPOST

http://listanything.blogspot.com/2009/01/7-people-i-am-totally-in-love-with-even.html

Places Whose Weather Forecasts Are On My Phone

1. Austin (High 102)
2. Marshall (High 92)
3. Lake Catherine (High 91)
4. Somers (High 88)
5. Milwaukee (High 84)
6. Madison (High 84)

The Incomplete List of Artists/Bands I Do Not Like Because I am Pretentious

Hootie and the Blowfish
Dave Matthews Band
Phish
James Taylor
Grateful Dead
Limp Bizkit
Linkin Park

Bodies of water I have been to this summer

This has definitely been the summer of getting tan at various lake/beach locations. Here is my list so far...

• Lake Brownwood
• Caddo Lake
• Lake Travis
• Lake Georgetown
• Atlantic Ocean (Miami Beach, FL)
• Matagorda Bay or Espiritu Santo Bay (Port O'Connor, TX - not sure which one Stephen's House is on)
• Pacific Ocean (LA on Aug 28)
• Lake Montage (the lake in my parent's neighborhood that is a very unnatural blue)

My Best Guess on Songs KGSR Has Played The Most

Except for "Morning Edition," I don't really listen to the radio all that much. But I was driving home for lunch the other day, scanning channels, and heard "6th Avenue Heartache" on KGSR (AAA station, aka K-Geezer). And I realized that it had not, in fact, been a long time since I had heard that song. Others that would make the list--

• Feelin' Good Again - Robert Earl Keen
  
• Wicked Game - Chris Isaak
• Constant Craving - k.d. lang
• Mercedes Benz - Janis Joplin
  
• Clocks - Coldplay
  

I don't know. I thought I would have more.

Songs That Should Be Banned From Weddings

• Love Shack
• Mustang Sally
• Brown Eyed Girl
• Shout
• Brick House
• Play That Funky Music
• Don't Stop Believin'
• We Are Family
• YMCA
• Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

What else?

The government is much more lax…

"Employees will groom and attire themselves in at least a neat, clean manner that will promote public confidence."

That’s it.

Dress Code Guidelines at The Firm

...to go along with Austen's list. Any others out there?

For MEN
APPROPRIATE:
* Professional business attire is always appropriate.
* Dress slacks/khaki type pants (well pressed with a crease that holds).
* Shirts with collars such as dress shirts, oxfords, button-downs. (All shirts must be tucked in).
* Sweaters/cardigans.
* Blazers/sports coats.
* Loafer type shoes.

For MEN
NOT APPROPRIATE:
x Shorts of any style or fabric.
x Jeans or denim attire (all colors), including denim shirts.
x Cargo pants, bicycle pants.
x Sweatshirts, T-shirts, tanks tops.
x Jogging/work out attire, lounging attire, leather attire.
x Collarless shirts are not appropriate.
x Sneakers/athletic shoes, flip flops, canvas sneakers, hiking boots.
x Provocative clothing (too short, too revealing, too tight, and too sheer) is never acceptable in a business environment.
x Clothing with inappropriate or offensive language or logos.
x Overly strong smelling cologne, perfume or body lotion.

For WOMEN
APPROPRIATE:
* Professional business attire is always appropriate.
* Dress slacks/Khaki type pants (well pressed).
* Dresses, skirts, pant suits, coordinating separates (dresses/skirts should not be shorter than 2” above the knee).
* Blouses and collared shirts with sleeves. Sleeveless sweaters and shells (no tank tops) are permissible if worn under a coordinating jacket or sweater. Please wear your outer garment when leaving the office or attending meetings.
* Sweaters/cardigans.
* Loafer type shoes or pumps. Dressy sling back heels or mules are permissible. Open-toed or peep toed shoes are permissible as long as they are conservative and appropriate with business casual attire. Hosiery is not required; however, feet should be properly pedicured and presentable at all times.

For WOMEN
NOT APPROPRIATE:
x Sun dresses of any style or fabric.
x Shorts/skorts, including walking shorts with or without a matching jacket.
x Cropped pants or capris.
x Jeans or denim attire (all colors), including denim shirts.
x Split skirts, cargo pants, overalls, stretch pants, bicycle pants, leggings.
x Spandex clothing, jogging/work out attire.
x Midriff revealing shirts or sweaters.
x Sweatshirts, t-shirts, tank tops, spaghetti straps, crop tops, or tube tops.
x Jogging/work out attire, lounging attire, leather attire.
x Sandals, sneakers/athletic shoes, flip flops, canvas sneakers, western or hiking boots.
x Provocative clothing (too short, too revealing, too tight, and too sheer) is never acceptable in a business environment.
x Clothing with inappropriate or offensive language or logos.
x Overly strong smelling cologne, perfume, or body lotion.

Marshall High School Student Dress Code Guidelines

What's Hot

• ID badges visible at all times
• Creative lanyards to display IDs
• Sunglasses worn only as an accessory
• Short, well groomed facial hair
• Shirt underneath any garment that does not meet dress code guidelines
• Shoes
• Pants
• Shorts or skirts following 3 inch rule
• Shirts that do not expose midriff when arms are lifted

What's Not

• Hats, caps, bandannas
• Excessive or distracting hair color/style
• Symbols, words, or slogans cut into hair that are obscene, racially/gang related, or provocative
• Piercing other than ears
• Gentlemen with makeup or nail polish
• Sunglasses worn over eyes
• Tank tops or low cut clothing. (neck or underarm) 2 inch rule
• Clothing that exposes midriff, back, and/or cleavage
• See-through provocative, or excessively tight clothing
• Dresses, skirts, all split garments, and shorts must be no more than 3 inches above the knee while properly worn when standing
• Loose clothing that results in “sagging”
• Visible undergarments
• Frayed or ragged short or pants
• Slogans across posterior
• House shoes
• Obscene language or symbols, provocative pictures, advertising tobacco/narcotics, jewelry, or exposed body parts
• Symbols on clothing or jewelry that would distract or cause undue attention
• Racially related symbols, emblems, pictures, words, slogans, or tattoos.
• Any accessory or clothing article deemed gang-related or dressing the same to show a pattern of dress deemed to be connected with gang activity
• Clothing worn in a manner for which it was not intended i.e., backwards, inside out
• No holes or tears in clothing above 3 inch rule
• Blankets
• Jackets cannot be used to cover inappropriate dress choices
• Pants bottoms which are wider than the shoe

Accidents That Happened in Front of 4412 Jeff Davis, Marshall TX

(that I know of)

• Jubal, our neighbor across the street, backs his car into our brick mailbox next to the sidewalk, breaking it into pieces. (We rebuilt it, but moved it from next to the sidewalk to next to the driveway.)
  
• Ragan's friend Rodney runs into our brick mailbox next to the driveway, breaking it into pieces.
• During Christmas break, Ms. Betty Jean Kincaid runs off the road while showing her niece the spinning Christmas tree decorated with multi-color blown-up balloons in Jubal's front yard. She smashes into Julie's awesome blue Probe which smashes into my cousin's car which smashes into my aunt Lyndel's car. Ms. Betty Jean Kincaid was the great-aunt by marriage of one of Ragan's friends.
• Julie's cousin Jim runs off the road because he dropped his coffee, or had a stroke, or something like that. Jim hits our brick mailbox, breaking it into pieces.
• My aunt Lyndel parks her car and inexplicably (or because she had too much Xanax) smashes into Derek's/Austen's friend Courtney's car.
• Derek has a bike wreck and needs stitches. Story to Mom (for years): He rode his bike into a parked pickup. True story: He rode his bike out of the back of the pickup and busted his ass.

Are there others?

Why I Hate Canada

So, apparently now that I have finally decided to see Montreal for the first time, Canada recently decided to tighten security and make my life a living hell. You now need a passport to cross into Canada. And since I have never had a passport, here is a list of things I will need to do before next Tuesday:

• fill out a DS-11 form and print it out
• have ready my original birth certificate
• have a valid driver's license
• * however, if said license is out of state (like mine is) I need a second ID. They do not specify what may qualify as a second ID.
• make a photocopy of said license
• have ready 2 (not 1) passport photographs that must be (identical, in color, 2x2, taken within the last 6 months, full-face front view with white background, between 1 inch and 1 3/8 inches from the bottom of the chin to the top of the head, taken in NORMAL street attire)
• get my hands on $106.00
• make an appointment at the passport place which is 2 hours away
  
• have proof of my vacation even though Jim is paying for everything

**** after attempting to get all of the above together I called to make an appointment since we're leaving on August 11th and the first available appointment is August 12th.

"but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father"

Cars I Have Owned

1. 1982 Oldsmobile Cutlass - kind of brownish. Christened The Traveling Honky Tonk by J***** T***** senior year. My parents bought it, but I paid them $60/month so that I would learn the value of a dollar.
2. 1990 Ford Probe - (not neon) blue. This car appeared in my driveway the week before I went to college. It got $5,000 worth of hail damage, and shortly after it was fixed, I crashed into a car on Valley Mills Drive in Waco because I was too busy looking at Hot Spanish Guy (from the student union) driving in the lane next to me.
3. 1999.5 Volkswagen Jetta - white. 10 years and 80,000 miles, and I just learned that the back seats fold ALL the way down, instead of just propped over. Missing one (1) side mirror and one (1) glove compartment handle.

I hope to keep it at 3 for the foreseeable future. No, not a jinx. Right??

Things I Wanted to Make a List About Tonight but Drank Too Much and Got Tired

• A Capella groups on youtube
• Things Jim and I are going to do in August
• Books I'm adapting into screenplays
• Reasons why Vodka works with anything
• How much I hate Derek and DJ for going to Puerto Rico
• Why television shows rarely get it right
• Exercises I HAVEN'T done this year
• People that have never been in my kitchen
  

People who were born on July 30th

people significant to listers, anyway, that I know of...

from the world of Famous Folks:

• Hilary Swank (everyone's-least-favorite-double-Oscar-winner and -karate-kid)

• Lisa Kudrow (star of the only movie Katie and I totally agree on)
  

• Laurence Fishburne (the guy that brought me and Alana together, and started the Daily Poll)
  

• Kate Bush (I don't know, I just love her and couldn't delete her from the list, like I did Vivica Fox, Tom Green, and Edd "Kookie" Byrnes (though I am going to look into him))
  

• Delta Burke (mine and Julie's and probably your favorite Sugarbaker)
  

• Jean Reno (The Professional)
  

• Arnold Schwarzenegger (Alana's Governor and driver of the car in my favorite cinematic car crash ever, See: Commando)

• Emily Bronte (rude not to include...everyone's favorite Bronte? or is that Charlotte?)

• Paul Anka (father-in-law of Jason Bateman, star of everyone's favorite TV show)
  

• Peter Bogdanovich (director of funniest movie ever made, and two of my favorite movies ever, interviewer of Alfred Hitchcock, and I haven't even mentioned Paper Moon)
  

• Henry Ford (Godfather of Julie's early 1990s Neon Blue Probe....so hott)

and

• Ronda

• WHC,IV

Found Lists

There are lots of lists out there on the world wide web and luckily, I spend way too much time on the internet. I am also intrigued by the idea of making a list of lists. So here are the best lists I have seen in the last week:

• 10 Worst Evolutionary Designs
• How to Violate Facebook Etiquette and Piss Off Your Friends
  
• The 20 Best Albums of 2009...So Far
• Top 10 Things Overheard at Sarah Palin's Farewell Party
• 5 Things Movie Trailers need to Stop Doing
• 31 National Geographic Photos
• Obama's Healthcare Press Conference in a Nutshell

And here is the worst list I have seen this week:

• Texas Monthly's 50 Best Burgers in Texas

Vacations I planned having drinks tonight

I made new friends this weekend we will call them AS and AM (husband and wife) Even though they live in Atlanta, we have planned many reunion events together...here they are:

• Weekend in Miami
• UT football game in Austin
• Christmas party in Houston
• Graduation party in Austin
• New Year's in Belize

I am guessing 2 of the above will actually happen. We will see. However I will say. It is very refreshing to meet new people.

My 18 Favorite "Con-Artist" Movies

In order (please note, these are not in order by preference in terms of general filmmaking but rather, how awesome the characters/cons are * also, I just woke up and am pretty sure I have yet to type a cohesive sentence)...

1. Heist
2. Rounders
   
3. The Sting
4. House of Games
   
5. Six Degrees of Separation
6. The Spanish Prisoner
7. Jackie Brown
   
8. Diggstown
9. Used Cars
   
10. The Hustler
11. Nine Queens
12. Ocean's 11
13. Catch Me if You Can
    
14. The Grifters
15. Tin Men
    
16. The Color of Money
    
17. Best Laid Plans
18. Confidence
    

And just for fun...my LEAST favorite...

1. Matchstick Men
2. The Big Bounce
3. The Sting II
4. Boiler Room
5. Heartbreakers
   

Things I did tonight while "working on my screenplay"

• Looked up how many ounces of wine are in a serving (five)
  
• Added two friends on Facebook
• Watched three clips from Karate Kid
• Converted five ounces to cups (almost 2/3)
• Realized candle wasn't lit
  
• Lit candle
  
• Poured glass of wine containing one serving
  
• Gave ratings to two albums in my iTunes library (five stars and three stars)
• Wrote dialogue for one scene
• Watched 20 seconds of trailers for Funny People and Public Enemies
• Thought about dislike of Christian Bale
• Washed dishes
• Reread first 33 pages of script
• Poured glass of wine containing one serving
  
• Checked email
• Wrote this list
  

Supper

Brought to you by Taco Bell®

• 1 Volcano Double Beef Burrito
• 1 Volcano Taco
• 1 Crunchy Taco
• 1 Chicken Quesadilla
• 1 Order of Cinnamon Twists
• 1 Large Pepsi
  

Some Albums I've Been Listening To

- Jason Lytle - Yours Truly, The Commuter
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOYOwv7AiZ0

- The Rural Alberta Advantage - Hometowns
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GupdrkZMYpA

- La Strada - La Strada EP
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OK3tEgbqN24

- The Avett Brothers - I and Love and You EP
http://aolradio.podcast.aol.com/aolmusic/mp3s/The_Avett_Brothers_I_and_Love_and_You.mp3

- Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMPF6lpM0XM

- Eels - Hombre Lobo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoqZOR9DTi4

- Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjecYugTbIQ

- Hayden - The Place Where We Lived
http://www.box.net/shared/static/cb2ef4etn8.mp3

- Modest Mouse - No One's First, and You're Next
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZh596lOft4&feature=channel_page

Things to do when you're at a lakehouse by yourself for 6 hours

• Look around
• Drink beer
• Think about getting in the pool
• Listen to music
• Start to watch nascar--then change your mind
• Smoke as many cigarettes as possible
• Ponder life
• Get bored, clean a little
• Stare at the grill and wish you had something to cook
• Think about turning on computer and doing some work
• Decide that work is gay
• Call a friend who doesn't answer
• Practice shuffleboard until you realize that it really isn't too much fun by yourself
• Notice that you are only 1 hour into said 6 hours and think, "Damn, this is gonna be a long list."
• Pee
• Kill bugs
• Go down to the water and look around there
• Stare at the fish under the boathouse and get 15 minutes of pure entertainment watching them try to eat your spit
• Almost step on a snake
• Talk to previously mentioned friend for an hour and a half (that killed some time)
• Decide to get in pool but it's too cold. Sit by pool and listen to frog croak who won't shut the fuck up
• Wish I was as patient as that frog
• Get the hiccups and realize it's only 9:30pm. Only 3.5 more hours to go

I think that was my last coherent thought. I have no idea what I did for the last few hours.

Things I Did Not Make It Home With Saturday Night

• Coozie
• Camera
• Ipod
• Sunglasses
• Cell phone
  
• Shirt
• Car
  
• Dignity

Things that have turned up so far: Camera & ipod (thanks, Karen); cell phone & car (thanks, Mark, a person/angel I just met on Saturday).

Colors of Jello Shots

• Orange
• Green
• Blue
• Purple
• Red
  

Oscars and Biopics

Well, it's that time of year again. We're in the "dead zone" of Oscar movies -- too late for Spring screenplays and too early for Fall performances. Apparently, though, we're just in time for some possible Oscar-nominated biopics.

1) Meryl Streep as nobody's favorite chef: Julie & Julia
http://www.hulu.com/watch/71540/movie-trailers-julie-and-julia

2) Nobody's favorite, 2-time Oscar winner, Hilary Swank, as some famous pilot: Amelia
http://www.hulu.com/watch/80553/movie-trailers-amelia

3) Everyone's favorite (in most cases only) French actress as some designer: Coco Before Chanel
http://www.hulu.com/watch/82147/movie-trailers-coco-before-chanel

*This post was brought to you by Hulu movie trailers and me sitting on my couch for 3 hours and counting.

Bars I Am Going to Tomorrow. On a bus.

• Little Woodrow's Midtown
• Shiloh Club
• Kay's
• (Under the) Volcano
• Tipsy Clover (can you say 2005?!)
  

Congrats, Jenny & Thomas!

Real Facebook Status Updates: True or False?

***'s singn--I gOt ☼sUnShiiiNe☼ , On a cLoUdY daAaaY~! *Lovn the many special and terrific peeps I share this so called life with.."bLeSsEd"..* (oFf 2GeT pRoDuCtIvE!)

*** can’t believe how focused she is at work if she starts her day with a little 5 am 3 mile run, a sit-down, nutritious breakfast with her family, and a some reading time with my little boy. He agrees that the second Harry Potter is the weakest in the series.

*** is 21 weeks pregnant with a healthy 12 ounce baby boy! I have gained 2 pounds which means I still weigh 3 pounds less then when I got pregnant. I think it is all in the boobs and belly. Yipee! Will post his newest mugshot tonight!

*** made her own cheese this morning. I know! But *** likes it better than the store bought stuff ;) I just can’t refuse him when he says, ‘Mama make cheese today?’

*** 's ExCiTED aBoUt tHe sHoRt wEeK/ loOoOnG wK'EnD~! CaNt wAIt tO lOuNgE / hAnG w/ FrIeNdS n FaM "cOoOkOT wHo'S iN?? "gRiLz!*

*** remembered to prepare and pack my macrobiotic lunch today, but forgot to bring beet salad I was hoping to have for a 3 pm snack. What was I thinking??? I’ll have to head to kindermusik on an empty stomach.

Quick Judgements: 2009 Emmy Nominations

Hooray!
22 nods for 30 Rock! 22!! Clearly the best show on the 'tube
How I Met Your Mother sneaks into Best Comedy
(NPH has clear line to victory, see below)
Kristin Wiig!!!
Jemaine Clement, Flight of the Conchords
(Glad to see they've finally caught on)
Family Guy!!!!

Boo!
No Jeremy Piven
(Last season was Entourage's worst, yet it scores a best comedy nod and Ari Gold is left out in the cold? Makes no sense)
Kyle Chandler and Connie Britton shafted...again. And no FNL for best drama? Whatever...
Does anyone even watch House? Or L&O:SVU for that matter?
Elisabeth Moss over January Jones? F*ck no...did you people even watch MM last season?
Boo to me: Why have I not watched a single episode of Damages?
Charlie Sheen and Tony Shalhoub again? Really?
NO MATTHEW FOX????? Ok, just kidding...relax Mr. Morris

Bill Murray movies, in order of my favorites

1. Quick Change
2. Rushmore
3. Groundhog Day
4. Broken Flowers
5. Stripes
6. Lost in Translation
7. Scrooged
   
8. Kingpin
   
9. What About Bob?
10. The Razor's Edge
    

*I am not including ensemble movies, so I have excluded The Royal Tenenbaums, Tootsie, Ed Wood, which would be like 1, 5, and 6.

** This is a difficult exercise. I keep flip-flopping on Groundhog Day and Rushmore. Consider them a tie.

Reasons CSI is one of the worst things to ever happen to television

1) It has since spawned not one, not two, but now officially 3 spin-offs: Miami, New York, and L.A.
2) It made CBS the number 1 network for many many years (and still going).
3) People like my mom can watch that shit every night but then complain about the "brain scene" in Hannibal. I mean, come on. They cut open little kids and grandmothers on that show! Every single episode!
4) William Petersen left the show and Laurence Fishburne took his place. While I like the latter, it just bothers me for some reason that they had to get someone just as nerdy. And why can't Dennis Quaid be the lead on one of these stupid shows? CSI New Orleans! Yeah that's right, send me my check.
5) Red-head bad actor guy on CSI Miami never, not ever, never ever actually contributes to solving any of the crimes. All he does is stand over bodies, put on his sunglasses, and say terrible one-liners.
6) Which reminds me -- I'm no cop, but I'm pretty sure CSI doesn't solve every case by themselves. Oh, and while on the subject, I'm also pretty sure they don't look like ANY of those smokin' hot chicks. Grrrrrrrr.
7) Gary Sinise is the lead on CSI New York and he's awesome but the show sucks. Such a waste.
8) William Petersen, Gary Sinise, and even red-headed bad actor guy have all been around for a long time and each made a shitload of movies, but these crappy shows are what they will end up being famous for. To Live and Die in L.A? Anybody? Manhunter?
9) Finally, and I don't know this for a fact, but I would think that these shows would affect jurors when it comes to murder cases. I'm not sure how, but I just think however it affects them -- it's not good.

Some things I’m anxiously awaiting

- Grass
- An end to the MJ coverage
- The Low Anthem album that should arrive in the mail any day
- Whitney Houston’s new album
- The start of Top Chef and Project Runway

Reasons Why I Hate You

Blaine - You are coming up to visit me on Saturday and haven't written or called to touch base. Sometimes I wonder why we are even friends.

Derek - You ruined movies for sale. You don't care enough like Blaine to even pretend to come visit.

Austen - I told you to come visit with Blaine and Julie and you, apparently, chose to pretend that email exchange never took place.

Michael - You are more popular dead than alive.

Surprising Facts

1. I just learned (after living there 6 years) that my apartment "complex" is called The Chalet. Which I find hilarious. I hope it becomes as ubiquitous as The Condo.
   
2. I know someone whose brother died when he was a baby, and then later when my friend was born, his parents gave him the SAME NAME.
3. My cousin, who is a teacher in Houston and whose parents are from Marshall, got married on 6/27/09 to a guy who works for Marathon Oil. This girl from Marshall, who works for Marathon Oil, got married on 6/27/09 to a guy who is a teacher in Houston.
   
4. Someone--many people, I guess--think it's a good idea to make a Smurfs movie.
   

And so it begins.

Big Brother 11, list 1 - First Impressions:

In order of just-barely-tolerate to hate:

1. Lydia
   
2. Jordan
3. Jeff
4. Kevin
5. Ronnie
6. Michele
7. Russell
8. Laura
9. Braden
10. Natalie
11. Chima
12. Casey
    

Jessie doesn't count because it is not a first impression. As you know, I hate him too. And also feel very sorry for him. It's complicated.

Great Days in 2009

This has got to be one of the best years ever.

• Square Root Day - 03/03/09
  
• Odd Day - 05/07/09
• Date/Time Alignment - 4:56 07/08/09
• Personal Favorite - 04/05/09

And still 09/09/09 to come!

What else?
Which one is your favorite?
Do you have a pencil darling?

3 People Who List Things Because of List Count

• Julie
• Jon
• Karen

I probably would, too, but haven't yet. I shouldn't make fun because I am a nerd for numbers (see next list).

grocery list 07.07

the 7th list in July in honor of 07.07...and i actually wrote down this list before i went to the store

• chicken
• chicken stock
• tuna steak
• zucchini
• carrots
• avocado
• red onion
• scallions
• sweet potatoes
• sesame seeds
• soba noodles
• mirin
• wasabi powder
• limes
• couscous
• rosemary
• cherry tomatoes

9 Favorite dereklm Tweets...so far...

9. "...going to eat mexican food in memory of the fake death of Jeff Goldblum" - no better reason to eat Mexican food...except maybe being in Mexico.

8. "Jenny Lewis = good, Houston crowd = as awful as you could possibly imagine, Jenny Lewis encore" = surprisingly awesome - makes you feel like you were there...plus I have a hard on for Jenny Lewis, so whatever.

7. "http://twitpic.com/80tol - My big catch" -- ohhhh the irony!

6. "bought tickets to Free Press Summer Fest. Houston's acting like an actual city! http://bit.ly/PWFms" - clicking the link and seeing the name "Explosions in the Sky" caused a near heart attack for yours truly.

5. "was going to a movie but Candice fell asleep, shocking. Now watching this abortion of a college baseball game. Come on Virginia" - Love the wordplay, and the back handed comment about one's girlfriend...well played.

4. "is in Marshall. Just saw a girl in a bikini and boots washing motorcycles on the side of the highway. Next task: take picture" - While the aforementioned snap never came, I'm beginning to think that Marshall is Narnia or something.

3. "KNOCK THAT TAX MONKEY OFF YO BACK!! http://bit.ly/PHzR" - No words.

2. "is twittering via text message after being inspired by the Iranians. I want to be ready in case of emergency." - Where it all started. Birth of a nation.

1. "woke up today, no truck outside. Apparently HPD towed it as an abandoned vehicle even though I drive it to work every day." Awesome. - Exactly what Twitter is all about...well that, self-promotion, and celebrity stalking.

soapbox

Yesterday was "the highest single-day [death] total in Afghanistan in nearly a year....Seven Americans, two Canadians and one Briton died in four separate incidents Monday."

So here is a list of Americans who have died since June 25:

1266	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	southern Afghanistan	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1265	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	southern Afghanistan	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1264	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Kunduz	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1263	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Kunduz	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1262	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Kunduz	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1261	07/06/09	NAME NOT RELEASED YET	Not reported yet		U.S. Army	Not reported yet	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Kunduz	Not reported yet	Not reported yet
1257	07/04/09	Fairbairn, Aaron E.	Private 1st Class	20	U.S. Army	3rd Battalion, 509th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division	Hostile - hostile fire - small arms fire, indirect fire	Combat Outpost Zerok (eastern Paktika province)	Aberdeen	Washington
1256	07/04/09	Casillas, Justin A.	Private 1st Class	19	U.S. Army	3rd Battalion, 509th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division	Hostile - hostile fire - small arms fire, indirect fire	Combat Outpost Zerok (eastern Paktika province)	Dunnigan	California
1254	07/02/09	Sharp, Charles S.	Lance Corporal	20	U.S. Marine	2nd Battalion, 8th Marine Regiment, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Helmand province	Adairsville	Georgia
1249	06/29/09	Lynch, Terry J.	Sergeant	22	U.S. Army	3rd Squadron, 71st Cavalry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry)	Hostile - hostile fire - IED attack	Wardak Province	Shepherd	Montana
1251	06/28/09	Drees, Steven T.	Private	19	U.S. Army	2nd Battalion, 12th Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 4th Infantry Division	Hostile - hostile fire - small arms fire, RPG	Landstuhl Reg. Med. Center	Peshtigo	Wisconsin
1250	06/26/09	Cross, Peter K.	Private 1st Class	20	U.S. Army	2nd Battalion, 87th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 10th Mountain Division (Light Infantry)

http://icasualties.org/oef/byNationality.aspx?hndQry=US

And this story is currently the 9th story on CNN.com, after:

• People moving briskly into arena for memorial
• Jackson memorial crowd may rival '84 Olympics 59 min
• iReport.com: How are you honoring MJ today?
• Time: Places to go to honor Michael Jackson
• Web braces for Michael Jackson onslaught
• Ticker: Obama pays his respects to MJ
• Police think South Carolina serial killer is dead
• Slain NFL star's girlfriend bought gun - police

< / soapbox >

Ben's First Annual All-American Tour of Dive Bars

The bars of the first AATDB:

• Ron's Pub and White Horse Inn
• Roll N Saloon
• Leon's Lounge
• Lone Star Saloon
• The GRAB
  
• The Spot Club
• Big Star Bar

RESULTS

Winner: Lone Star Saloon or Roll N Saloon (feel free to add comments to declare a winner)

Loser: Leon's Lounge (suffering from new management, apparently)

Most Fun: The Spot Club

Most Likely to Visit on a Regular Basis: Big Star Bar

Most Dangerous: Ron's Pub and White Horse Inn

Most Out of Business: The GRAB (RIP)

Join us next Independence Day weekend for the 2nd annual AATDB.

Liz Lemon's Pro/Con List for Dennis Duffy

PROS

• basically nice
• takes good care of his feet
• makes good chili
• remembers my birthday
• rarely wants to do it
• is funny when he goofs on his friends
• doesn't care about money
• loyal
• too lazy to cheat
• would increase likelihood of a blue-eyed kid
• loves The Simpsons
• has good hair
• has already seen me throw up two times
• fixed tv
• Jack likes him

CONS

• not super smart
• listens to Winger
• dental hygiene
• wears acid wash denim
• always wants foot rubs
• not much money
• catholic
• doesn't like his mother
• I don't like his mother
• his mother doesn't like me
• loves Family Guy
• reads The Post
• insists on spending holidays with his mother
• has already seen me throw up
• attempted threeway
• racist
• wears Italian horn even though Irish ***this is the only one I couldn't quite make out.
• Jack likes him

***All in all he doesn't sound like a bad guy

what you get for free when you buy a briskett at HEB

• 12-pack of HEB soda
• 20-pack tortillas
• bag of romaine lettuce
• can of black beans
• bag of potato chips
• onion dip
• sausage
• frozen fruit bars

Official State Heroes of Texas

As decreed by the Texas Legislature....

1. Davy Crockett
2. Stephen F. Austin
3. Sam Houston
4. Earl Campbell

In case you don't believe it, because I didn't when I saw it on the news last night.

http://www.texasmonthly.com/2001-09-01/sports.php

my lists about miami for P.Jenks friend

I received this email this morning...

Subject: Miami
Can you give me some hotels, bars, & restaurants with a brief description.
Also, what is the dress code generally like? Do women wear dresses or are pants ok?

Places to eat

• Nemo - "casual nice" think Z Tejas or Moonshine - but Miami style. Great atmosphere, large outdoor patio. Consistently good food. I have been here on multiple trips http://www.nemorestaurant.com/
• Blue Room - inside Delano - very nice, and pricey, but the food was amazing
• Barton G - also pricey, but very neat atmosphere, and fun presentation on food, if you are going to go to one super expensive dinner I would maybe go here.
• Sushi Samba - according to my aunt - best Sushi on the beach
• Big Pink - diner food open 24 hours - huge portions - great lunch place or late night. owned by the same people as Nemo
• Joe's Stone Crab - think traditional steak house, but with sea food. Miami institution. stone crabs are not in season during the summer
• Nexxt Cafe - casual on Lincoln Road; salads sandwiches, burgers, etc...
• Ice Box - small cafe off Lincoln Road - has great desserts

Bars - I know the least about this. Most of the bars are in hotels. Miami bars are a lot like Vegas bars, so a lot of table service and really into guy/girl ratio. Guys usually have to pay more to get into places or pay at all versus women. I would talk to the concierge in your hotel about what bars are good and have them offer suggestions. That is what we did the last 2 times I went and how I learned about Plunge and Prive.

• I know the Delano and the Shore Club have great loungey poolside bars, but I don't know the names (probably no cover and table service not needed)
• Plunge - rooftop bar on top of Ganesvoort - loungey and casual - I really liked this place. (we went early and didn't need table service)
• The new hot "club" is in the Fountainbleu but I do not know the name of it.
• Prive - total scene club - we had our concierge at the hotel get us a table and get us in ( I went here 2 years ago - so may not be cool anymore)

General
Lincoln Road is an outdoor shopping/ dining district. Tons of outdoor cafes, restaurants, and shops. (Ice Box, Nexxt, and Sushi Samba are all on Lincoln Road) Shops range from local boutiques, to tourist souvenir shops, and national stores, like Banana Republic, Anthropologie etc.

Ocean Drive is another outdoor area along the beach. More touristy with bars, restaurants, etc.

Dress Code
During the day walking around Ocean Drive or Lincoln Road I wore my bathing suit and a cover-up or a cotton dress. VERY causal. For dinners/going out I wore dresses most of the time, but people who were with us wore jeans, pants, or capris and "cute shirts"

Six videos currently open in my browser I am waiting to watch

I hope they are all good.

• http://www.hulu.com/watch/78867/the-tonight-show-with-conan-obrien-triumph-visits-bonnaroo-part-1

• http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/ny-usgay0626,0,650780.story

• http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/showbiz/2009/06/24/dcl.pete.grumbine.new.music.cnn?iref=videosearch

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4aIblRt72g&feature=related

• http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIfCkO5wwXY

• http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=231547&title=Jason-Jones:-Behind-the-Veil---Ayatollah-You-So

As an added bonus, videos I have already watched today:

• http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=7913530

• http://www.hulu.com/watch/59224/late-night-with-conan-obrien-old-time-baseball

Enjoy, or don't